By Dr. Ali Aminulloh, M.Pd.I. ME
Amidst the increasingly dazzling progress of this era, one thing remains increasingly fragile: marriage. Technology advances, the economy grows, lifestyles change… but households often collapse faster than even the tallest buildings. The divorce rate in Indonesia reached 399,921 cases in 2024. This figure reminds us that love is not always easy to maintain in the realities of modern life.
This phenomenon is not just a number. It is the story of millions of people who struggle, fail to communicate, and ultimately choose to separate. The dominant cause of divorce at the national level is persistent disagreements and arguments, which trigger more than 57%–62% of all cases. In West Java, the province with the highest divorce rate in Indonesia, 88,985 couples divorced, or around 22.3% of the national total. In West Java, the regency with the highest divorce rate is Indramayu. There were 6,829 recorded divorce cases throughout 2024, or 7.7% of the provincial total.
Behind these figures lies an important message: that many couples do not yet understand the true essence of family. Therefore, in many communities, understanding the meaning of marriage as more than just a ritual, but a foundation for life, is becoming increasingly relevant.
That morning, January 17, 2026, at Joyland Haurgeulis, a simple yet meaningful event took place. Bayu Akbar Pradana bin Ayi Jatman from Sukabumi tied the knot with Ardina Nurul Hayati binti Carim, two people who chose not only love, but also a lifelong commitment.
In a marriage counseling session, Dr. Ali Aminulloh explained that the marriage contract in the Quran is called mitsaqan ghalidzan: a strong covenant mentioned only three times in the holy book, paralleling God’s covenant with the prophets and with the Children of Israel. Marriage, he said, is a sacred covenant that demands sincerity and full awareness.
The Prophet also described marriage as completing half of one’s religion: whoever marries has half of their religion perfected, and the other half is the duty of maintaining it with piety. Therefore, one’s attitude toward one’s spouse becomes a parameter of one’s nobility: “The best of you are those who are best to their wives.”
In choosing a partner, the Prophet even emphasized four important factors: beauty, wealth, lineage, and deen (religion). However, of these four, religion is the most crucial. So, how does physical beauty, wealth, and lineage find meaning when supported by morals and inner awareness?
This is the common thread with the trilogy of awareness initiated by Shaykh AS Panji Gumilang:
1. Philosophical awareness: understanding the meaning of marriage as an act of worship and a lifelong bond.
2. Ecological awareness: nurturing relationships like an interdependent and growing ecosystem.
3. Social awareness: understanding that marriage is not just a matter of two people, but a vital cell in society.
Marriage understood with this holistic awareness can make the family a haven, a place where people can return and find peace (sakinah). The Quran describes this goal through sakinah, mawadah, and rahmah: peace born of love, filled with tenderness and compassion.
Love is not merely a social media romance, but a lived practice that requires cooperation, communication, and a willingness to complement each other’s shortcomings. And when that is achieved, then the lyrics of Bunga Citra Lestari’s song are true:
The most valuable treasure is family,
The most precious palace is family,
The most meaningful poetry is family,
And the priceless pearl is family.
In a world that is constantly changing, perhaps the greatest revolution is a return to the true meaning of love, towards a strong, conscious marriage and a solid family.
Indramayu, January 18, 2026
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